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UNDERSTANDING SUICIDE

21/09/2020 23:09:00 BY RUNSFORD LARYEA

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Calling this week’s piece a sequel to last week’s would be a tad misleading, however, it would not be entirely wrong. Besides the fact that not only are we still in the month that has a specific day set aside to raise awareness on suicide prevention, there also exists a lingering feeling that says more needs to be said about the topic. Indeed more needs to be said about suicide, especially taking into consideration the rate of knots, with which it continues to claim the lives of our beloved brothers and sisters.

If I were to be asked for my two cents on how to explain what suicide is and what it stems from, my response would suggest that it is an idea borne off a distorted and disoriented human mind. The sources or causes of this distortion may vary (as touched on last week), whether it be from an internal source such as the presence of a mental illness (depression, for instance) or from external sources like relationships with others, traumatising life experiences (such as in the cases of rape victims) and events occurring at home, work or school.

To further explain this psychological distortion of the mind; it is one that normally (in the case of suicidal individuals) inflicts changes and alterations in mainly how they view themselves on a personal level, within their societal context and in relation to others. This also has broad ramifications on the decisions the individual makes, especially how they perceive and interpret their personal experiences and varying events that occur in their lives. Overtime, as this psychological distortion advances, their lives become dull and characteristically plagued with dreariness and a loss of interest in general life.

Traumatising

This is why a change in behaviour of a person who, under normal circumstances is quite the opposite, is a primary warning sign (or in medical terms: a symptom) of the existence and possible presence of suicide ideation, especially taking into consideration that person has experienced traumatising events. For clarification purposes, suicide ideation implies that the individual has or is feeling isolated, maybe ashamed and emotionally handicapped so much so he or she no longer feels an active part of their social environment and therefore feels the need to remove him or herself from it.

Another set of actions that can be considered a ‘suicide alert’ would be a sudden withdrawal from friends and family. A person may go days without speaking to relatives or go days without responding to phone calls or text messages. These are the kind of people, who may be at their lowest, therefore, if you know where they stay, it would not be such a bad idea to visit them.

To bring definition to the nature and possible precipitating factors contributing to the climb in the suicide rate in our country, one would have to reference our cultural context. Traditionally, in the instance of the typical Eswatini male, you are by virtue of that already living within a certain bracket of expectation.

You are expected to be the primary breadwinner and provider, which is how you are able to ascertain prominence and stature in your family and community. If he is unable or losses his ability to do this, the young male slowly slips into passivity and because he is still reeling from the guilt of failing to meet his family’s expectation, he develops feelings of inferiority and inadequacy toward himself. He begins to feel like he is a no good worthless shame, who is a prime example of ‘what you should not be’.

Sadly this is the case with busloads of men (and women) young and old out there. They are loaded heavily with psychological baggage they are unable to share, even with those closest to them.

The time is now to shelve the judgemental attitudes and comments about how you are trying to be ‘in style’ talking about being suicidal. They are not helping unfortunately. Pass a positive comment for once and witness how beautifully it can make that person’s day.