Times Of Swaziland: PLEASE! I’M TALKING

PLEASE! I’M TALKING
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Chris Morgan on 19/09/2024 07:35:00


The title is not the writer remonstrating with the reader, who has chosen to
chat with a friend or colleague, instead of reading this article. It’s an
expression that is usually delivered politely, but firmly, during a discussion
with someone who frequently interrupts while thespeaker attempts to hold the
floor. It’s especially conspicuous, as well as quite effective, when you’re
someone like Kamala Harris engaging in debate with Donald Trump.
Enough of them for the time being. The world seems to have stopped, in order to
focus on their public debate and other utterances – sadly, mostly insults –
between the two contenders. And it will dominate the headlines for the next
seven weeks until the United States of America (USA) national election. Well, it
is important since the winner will lead the biggest democracy in the world and
rest assured that Ms Harris, who is now certain to win, (a bold prediction
costing me nothing) will be supported by some very capable advisers.
Favoured
And fortunately, she does not stoop to the verbal squalor favoured by Trump. No,
last week we were on a journey, perhaps to solidify the writer’s preference
for staying on the terra firma that we know and trust. Preferable to stepping
out into space just to wave back to family and friends 720km away on Earth.
Followed by engineer Sarah Gillis, billionaire Jared Isaacman did the first
private spacewalk. An equally big deal is the personal history of Mr Isaacman
who did the first bit of ‘stepping out’ at 16 years of age in 1999, when
starting a highly lucrative point-of-sale payment company. Wherein lies the
motivation exhibited by this guy?  It needs to be passed on to the young
emaSwati. Can someone get to him on social media and find out?
Our last stop a week ago was Wales, so in a spirit - without notes - of harmony,
we cross the English Channel, a piece of water that has seen some mighty battles
protecting England, last invaded in 1066 – no, that’s not a misprint - at
the Battle of Hastings. Please read on the Internet the marvellous poem of that
name, written by Marriot Edgar a century ago. You will not be disappointed. It
stands out for its use of colloquial language, to be read out perhaps in a
Manchester accent, as it playfully retells a very significant historical event.
The overall style is more akin to an entertaining anecdote than a sombre bit of
history.
Invasion
The attacker in that invasion was William, the Duke of Normandy, who, after
‘shooting King Harold in the eye’ and beating the Saxon army into a hasty
retreat, took over the throne. Can you believe that French was the language of
the English royal court for the next 300 years. What a cheek! Then came the 100
Years War between the two countries. Can you just imagine a war of that length?
I don’t think there are any survivors still alive (lol) so we perhaps have to
guess why there is, buried inexplicably among some Brits, a quiet animosity
towards the French.
There would be no justification for that. England (well the United Kingdom (UK),
of which England is one of four member countries) and France have fought
together in two world wars and then partnered economically and politically for
many years before the UK left the European Union in 2016. And in a lasting
memory is the extent to which French is so conspicuous in the English language.
I doubt that you need to know any French to manage to get the gist of the
average sentence. And how cosy that we’ve swapped a few words to be kept in
their original form.
The English use ‘entrepreneur’, ‘deja-vu’ and ‘rendez-vous’, in
precisely the French format, while the French have adopted words like
‘weekend’, ‘meeting’ and ‘shopping’. Does that perhaps suggest the
French have spent a lot of time talking about the English ‘spending all
weekend meeting to go shopping?’ But the French language is so elegant and
stylish. Forgive me if previously I’ve offered the following story (a joke)
about the English friend who was in New York and was so impressed by the name
and popularity of a restaurant there, called Bonjour Croissant that he rushed to
Paris and opened a restaurant called Hello Toast. Not stylish.
Influence
English itself must be one of the most mongrel – that is, mixed breed –
languages. After emerging from the influence of the dialects and vocabulary from
early invasions by the Germanic people, it absorbed the words of many other
languages, including French, Greek, Dutch and Latin. The highly skilful Romans
brought water supply and plumbing – even underfloor heating – to England as
well as the Latin. But their Roman Empire got too big and faded 1700 years ago,
as did the British Empire much later, albeit in a more orderly manner. Too big
an Empire doesn’t work. Mr Putin, are you listening?
Latin became a dead language after evolving into Vulgar Latin and eventually
Italian. Poor old Dan Quayle, a former vice-president of the USA, was credited,
well, discredited, with having said – “I was recently on a tour of Latin
America, and the only regret I have was that I didn’t study Latin harder in
school.” It proved to be untrue, but Mr Quayle, already known for being an
intellectual lightweight, had to tolerate its addition to the other gaffes which
he really did make on the speech platform.