Times Of Swaziland: DIGITAL WORLD TELLS US WHO TO BE, WHAT TO WANT DIGITAL WORLD TELLS US WHO TO BE, WHAT TO WANT ================================================================================ Editor on 30/05/2023 08:15:00 Sir, Many people are trying to fit in, be liked and be accepted by other human beings. So as a result what they present on their social media profiles has become a mere presentation of who they think they should be than reflections of who they really are. Living in a society that values and strives for perfection and defines success by the amount of money people have in their bank accounts and not by how well they live their values every day. Because of societal expectations and standards people are constantly balancing inner and outer aspects of themselves in order to better fit in, to become successful or to find love. Driven Most people are driven to find their place in society and they want to be respected for who they truly are and what they have to contribute. Many people have a desire to know and live their purpose, to find deeper meaning in their lives and to feel the fulfillment that comes with becoming a more authentic person. The background is also a hinder because human beings were molded or raised as children by their parents, care givers, teachers, religions, peers and society to fit in. As a result they develop beliefs, thoughts, emotions and behaviorus that keep them acting in the ways they were taught to act not in the ways that make them feel like their authentic selves. Being authentic also benefits your mental health especially because being your true self is a bedrock of well-being. Purpose It is correlated with self-esteem, purpose, vitality and also the ability to set and accomplish goals. It is also linked to coping skills that allow people to navigate life’s challenges in healthy ways rather than resorting to self-destructive habits such as drugs and alcohol abuse. It is also related to mindfulness which refers to being aware of one’s experiences without judgment. Practicing mindfulness leads people to think differently and become ,more observed, accepting and capable of change. From what I have personally observed especially through social networks/media and those around me, I would say that people are not living life as their authentic selves. There is what they call ‘the adaptive self’ in psychology, where by the self prioritises fitting in, getting along and generally doing what you are told or what is expected of you. Adapting You find yourself in a situation where you are constantly adapting yourself to fit in. As an individual you shouldn’t let other people’s expectations limit who you are especially because what others expect of you is a reflection of who they are, their own wants and needs, who they want you to be so you can be part of their life. There are a number of hindrances to mastering the art of being your true self. The digital world tells us who to be, what to want and how we should express ourselves. All these influences are slowly chipping away at our ability to be our authentic selves. People’s identity on social media sometimes departs from what they view as their true self or the self they are when offline.