Times Of Swaziland: MIND  YOUR LANGUAGE WITH CHILDREN

MIND  YOUR LANGUAGE WITH CHILDREN
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Editor on 04/11/2024 07:51:00


Sir,
I am writing to express my concerns regarding the state of parenting in our
society today. Upon observing the dynamics of many households, it is evident
that little has truly changed over the years. It seems that mothers, in
particular, often engage in lengthy verbal outbursts, which can lead to
regrettable statements made in the heat of the moment.Let us acknowledge that no
family is perfect, and it is crucial to address the realities that many children
face. In households where one or both parents are involved in extramarital
affairs, an atmosphere of tension and undercurrents inevitably arises. The
children in these environments often bear the brunt of the resulting emotional
fallout.
Redirect
When a father comes home late, it is not uncommon for the mother to redirect her
frustration towards one of the children, sometimes resulting in harsh treatment.
Rather than confronting the root of her distress – her husband’s infidelity
– she misplaces her anger, affecting the very individuals she should nurture
and protect. As a result, children growing up in such circumstances may perceive
promiscuity as normal, struggling later in life to commit to a single partner.
Reality
They internalise these behaviours as acceptable, when in reality, such patterns
can lead to a cycle of dysfunction. It is imperative that those involved seek
counselling and support; denial only deepens their misery and perpetuates the
cycle. Additionally, I have noticed that many parents delegate the
responsibility of raising their children to helpers, only to later lament their
inability to communicate effectively with them. This detachment creates an
environment where children may shy away from interaction, lacking the necessary
communication and social skills that are vital for their development. I urge
adults to reflect before speaking disparagingly to minors.
Pasts
Many of us experienced similar negativity in our pasts and vowed never to
replicate those behaviours. Yet, too often, we find ourselves mirroring the very
actions we once detested. The power of our words should not be underestimated;
they can either uplift or destroy. I often hear people claim that I had a
perfect upbringing, attributing my current character to it. I would argue that
my upbringing was far from perfect, but I consciously chose to treat others with
the respect I longed for myself. Thank you for taking the time to read my
thoughts on this important matter. I believe that open dialogue about parenting
and its implications is essential for fostering a healthier future for our
children.
Jorge-Antonio