Times Of Swaziland: PERSONAL GOALS UNREACHED: HANDLING DISAPPOINTMENT

PERSONAL GOALS UNREACHED: HANDLING DISAPPOINTMENT
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Runsford Laryea on 05/11/2024 08:24:00


Eleven months into it, this year is already showing very clear glimpses of its
coming to an end, which is worth noting came a lot sooner than most of us had
anticipated. The year, which began with such optimism and hope both on a
societal collective as well as on the individual front, brought with it
aspirations for positivity, prosperity, stability, and recovery considering all
that had befallen our country (and the world, generally) in the preceding couple
of years.
Ambitions
Most of us headed into twenty twenty-four with ambitions to re-establish our
normal life patterns, to get ourselves and our career paths back on the right
track following various reasons for derailment, as well as to grow, achieve and
celebrate as much as possible with those we consider our loved ones. On a
personal level, many had set out with similar ambitions (and more) with the
hopes of turning them into reality as the year wore on, as generally this is how
we approach the start of a new year. However, as is the case with every year,
things do not always pan out as we plan them to, regardless of how meticulous we
may consider ourselves to be. With this being (arguably) one of the harshest
life truths to stomach, it would be helpful to place it into a bit of
perspective and try to make peace with it while grasping the important lesson it
serves up.
Impact
From a mental health standpoint, all of how we live, what we wish and hope for
our lives passes through endless thought processes, planning and some kind of
mental investment, and because of that, it will undeniably have an impact on us
if or when it does not go as we planned. Of course, this has a frustrating
element to it, and not only that, psychologically it negatively alters the way
one sees oneself; hence we start assuming we are failures or that we are not
good enough. In a sense, this is justified, and in assuming responsibility for
our actions, it comes with a degree of mental health to feel like that in the
wake of personal adversity.
However, where many of us fail is in making a recovery from that and taking from
the setback some tools that help us start rebuilding our character and image
again. Going back to January, there are people who still go through their new
year’s resolutions checklists that has not been checked even once, and of
course, it is emotionally troubling to realise what you have and what you have
not achieved up until this point. It is equally important that while you do
that, you do not impose too much aggression, disappointment, and judgment on
yourself; ‘cut yourself some slack’ is the popular expression that
encapsulates my point. In essence, there could have been many reasons as to why
you could not set out to meet your goals this year, with some of them probably
beyond what you could have done.
Therefore, whether it is dropping out of the gym after you swore to lose weight
or not being able to pursue that Master’s degree this year, the best part
about it is that you still have the opportunity to pursue that particular goal
with every chance of acquiring it. What we need to avoid is being too
downtrodden by what we are able to achieve in our (daily) lives in comparison to
what we ambitiously would like to gain, because this is what drags many
individuals deep into mental health troubles as they battle themselves in their
own minds.
My advice is, do what you can; there is no need to beat yourself up.
Send comments to runsford0505@gmail.com