I like it, thank you

Waka waka Oh! Oh! It’s time for Magogo. Hello everyone, today I am in high spirits. One of my former classmates gave birth to twins. If I cared less about English like my kwaito boy Mandoza (Inkalakatha), I would have said my ex-classmate gave birth to two twins.

This is what Inkalakatha said after touring a South African hospital. He saw twins (a boy and girl) and came out to declare that he saw two twins. Thanks. Since I respect the Queen language I will stick to twins. Thanks, once more. As I was saying in my opening line, waka waka Oh! Oh! It’s time for maGogo. Indeed, Its time for magogo to talk to her WHYLESS announcers.

The WHYLESS was partly cloudy with minor sore throats, light drizzle of dead air with easterly winds of hip hop but generally quiet on petty mistakes’ side. I also felt a new strange but sweet breeze. Thanks.

By now you are all aware that gogo is today not in her robust yet friendly attitude. This is all thanks to WHYLESS announcers doing their respective jobs. There is a new WHYLESS child of mine who goes by the name Nomvuyo Izzo.

All said and done her voice passed the test. I wish I could say it is sweet. I will not. The reason is that in as far as I am concerned there is only one sweet voice I know on the WHYLESS, currently. It belongs to my one and only Thembi ‘Billy Jean’ Hlophe. Here we are talking about a sweet WHYLESS voice. Thanks.

While I was scratching my grey hair on the middle name I would give Nomvuyo, she provided one herself thanks to stage fright. At one point she sounded in a bit of a hurry and it ended up with words evaporating.

Take it easy my girl. While you are at it, I will christen you ‘Take it Izzy’. I like it and unfortunately it matters not what you think about your middle name. Relatively speaking, I enjoyed your company and I am sure with time you will be a star.

I am getting hooked to Winile ‘Lobamba’ Dlamini. However, I will dump her in no time if she continues with keeping an old woman like me in suspense. My girl, tell me now who is getting married among my WHYLESS girls or boys.

She hinted something to that effect and I was left fuming because I would have thought gogo would be among the first to know for purposes of forcing the groom to strip and strut his stuff for gogo to count the number of packs. They should be six but I want nothing less than nine. Waka waka Oh! Oh! It’s time for a groom to strut his stuff.

I also heard Bongani ‘Bobo’ Dlamini say one or two words on the mysterious pending wedding, he too, did not say much. Thanks for giving them that Boyz II Men advice. I also hate common wedding theme songs. I am better I sang for myself during mine. Thanks.

As gogo, I was pleased to hear that some WHYLESS announcers participated in the ‘Walk for Hunger’ campaign last weekend. Unfortunately I could not make it as I could not find someone to listen to the WHYLESS on my behalf. My goats were also a concern.

Let’s get started

* Thandiswa ‘Mfazi’ Ginindza continues to impress me. Her reporting while travelling with His Majesty King Mswati III was delicious. However in future she will need to prepare a report on the proceedings prior to going on air.

* I did not like it when she expected her colleagues this side to ask about what was happening and what was to happen next. Next time she should take a leaf from her colleague Mbhekeni ‘Fire’ Mlilo. Otherwise ‘Mfazi’ is still in line to become my favourite girl in the near future.

* Mbuso ‘Do it again’ Ntshingila’s breakfast show was exciting this week. What brought more smiles was his female co-pilot or should I say co-presenter that I have just named ‘Take it Izzy’.

* Her voice sounds like that of my daughter who studies in South Africa. That made me like her more. She brought some slight change as I found myself listening to hip hop.

* The duo’s play list this week actually moved my breasts to the left, right and finally straight. I am joking, how could that happen given my age. Please keep ‘Take it Izzy’ around longer, I liked your partnership my children.

* ‘Do it again’ finally aired a ‘fresh’ programme on his ‘Reflections’ where he hosted one reverend. I guess hosting a reverend was the best thing under the circumstances. I had planned to march to the WHYLESS offices naked if he repeated one of the many repeats. Infact, the jury is still out to verify if the reverend was not doing it again.

* ‘Do it again’ needed a reverend to help him confess his sins and have them erased in the name of God. Amen. Still on ‘Do it again’, I hate telling a child one and the same thing on a weekly basis. I am watching your every step, every sentence and your whole body as it were. Thanks.

* On Wednesday, Cynthia ‘Country’ Thwala prematurely left her mid-day show due to a sore throat. I understood and hope she gets well soon. I felt bad because this girl of mine is picking herself up after a rocky start. I also like rock music by the way.

* After the throaty issues, ‘Country’ left us with ‘Take it Izzy’. She was tasked with keeping us hooked to the WHYLESS from 1:30pm to 2pm. Just 30 minutes. This reminds me of my favourite drink ‘Minute Maid’ (or is it ‘Made), whatever.

* I enjoyed the 30 minutes with ‘Take it Izzy’. Not because she made it a point that all her songs were preceded by the station’s jingles but because of the love she showed for hip hop.

* I am not used to listening to hip hop during ‘Country’s shift but for the first time ‘Take it Izzy’ dedicated the entire half an hour to such music. I liked it but for future she must know that too much of something is definitely dangerous.

* Like I said earlier on, I hope to hear more of ‘Take it Izzy’ especially once she overcomes the stage fright sickness which I easily picked. As stated above, at one stage, she sounded like someone who suffered a rare sickness called ‘words evaporation’. Take it easy my girl. Thanks.

* Mbekezeli ‘Batsatse’ Mabilisa finally hosted his ‘Letibilako’ programme last Saturday where he played us all the songs that were released during the World Cup. I hope he will be available to host the programme this week. I have been enjoying his play list during his 8-mid- night show. Thatha amahugs kugogo my boy.

* Newsreaders Gugu ‘Studio mixup’ Masuku, Pholile ‘Soft voice’ Maziya and Maveni ‘Mlingani’ Gwebu impressed me. The trio have been reading both siSwati and English news bulletins interchangeably. In short they generally have good relationship with their work. Thanks.

* ‘Soft Voice’ should always remember to inform us when the next news bulletin will follow after reading the lunch-time news. Just a small point.

* What happened to Mpumelelo ‘Dead Air’ Fakudze as I have not been hearing much of him and the dead air? I am happy that there has been some climate change when it comes to Ncamsile ‘Veteran’ Matsebula. She is now in the 21st century with the weather forecast. Thanks.

l Nathi ‘Prof’ Hlophe continues to be a good boy in as far as listening to the elders. He played the song I have been missing on his play list for a while.

* This week he reminded me of those days of ‘encore’ when he played one love song twice in succession. That was on Wednesday at 12:55am. I liked the song but not what he did because I believe his play list is rich enough and does not need to press the repeat button. You are still my favourite boy though. Thanks.

* Mfundo ‘Sportsman’ Khumalo seems to be winning my heart when it comes to sports coverage of late. Last weekend he gave us a fair coverage of a cycling competition held somewhere in Siteki.

* I like diversity but then he needs to also play fair to other sports. Why did he fail to cover something in Big Bend and I hope he will be covering the upcoming netball games. I like netball and balls in general. A ringside report from boxing would also be appreciated. Thanks.

* Still on sports, I am looking forward to tomorrow’s MTN league grand opening of the WHYLESS coverage from the duo of Veli ‘Kofi’ Simelane and Moses ‘Triple M’ Matsebula.

* I was impressed by their Charity Cup performance and hope they can do better in terms of analytical views from experts and the proceedings on the day. What happened to Isaiah ‘Ice Lobaba’ Dlamini? Not that I miss him, just asking.

* Nonhlanhla ‘Ezimnanderi’ Dlamini has kept me happy by producing her choral choir music programme despite the fact that she is on leave. How I wish she was back on air because I miss riding ‘Sitimela’ with her. My favourite song was ‘Ishungwayi’.

* Thembi ‘Billy Jean’ Hlophe’s African sounds this week was as exciting as ever. She had a female guest from one local organisation who played great music in celebration of women’s month.

l I liked the fusion jazz music selection from your guest Bhadala ‘Pay Up’ Mamba who also honoured us women with great songs from African women. Thanks and I still love you.

* Lindelwa ‘LD’ Mafa delivered traffic reports and further played music from local artists during her breakfast show. The least said about her news reading the better. Kwente- njani ‘LD’?

* Winile ‘Lobamba’ Dlamini also played some hip hop music. It was the first time I heard her play such music and I loved it. I was pleased to hear her apologise after she played us the wrong version of the Parliamentary programme on Thursday morning. She rectified her mistake and eventually played the right programme. Thanks.

* It happens that some children begin to misbehave when you pay little or no attention on what they are doing. One such child is Senzo ‘Mr Malaza’ Malaza.

*While I admire the marvellous way he reads the news, I was disturbed this week when he committed schoolboy mistakes on the Thursday 7am news bulletin. He forgot to rehearse. Basop boy!

* I still like Gcinangaye ‘Koni’ Tsabedze. However, I don’t like it when she fails to pronounce the name of Namibian President’s name. Thanks ‘Mr Malaza’ for putting her on the spot.

*‘Kofi’ must continue with the good work of reading out newspaper headlines. I did not know there is another newspaper apart from the other one where WHYLESS announcers feature. He said something like ingwazi. I will be opening mine and I will christen it Magogo.

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