LOVE IS NOT BLIND

Madam,

I  know we have been told and made to believe love is blind when in fact it is not blind. I agree, love is the most beautiful invention God brought to the third planet in the world and whoever loathes love, is blind.
My friends know how much I am a sucker for love and relationships, they know how many times I’ve tried this love thing but it still didn’t work out; and this is why I have come up with the conclusion that love is not blind.
I am from a fresh breakup of a three-year relationship in which I honestly had the best time of my life, despite the ending of things.

As I was reflecting on what actually brought us to this point with my ex partner, I realised I was actually lying to myself all this time about love being blind and all that they say when things go south.

blind

I realised that it was not that love is blind, but it was me who chose to ignore the red flags she showed me, I am the one who thought it would be best for the relationship if I didn’t bring up how much I hated how she treated me when she was having bad days, I am the one who stupidly said I was okay with things I was never okay about.

All these things accumulated and ended up making one big bomb that burned my heart into ashes.
Look, I am not saying we should not give our spouses second chances, I am not saying we shouldn’t ignore some things they do for the sake of the relationship nor am I saying we should always complain about things they do and doing things for them because it will make them happy. All I am saying is that second chances should be given to people who show genuine remorse of what they did, we should not pay attention to insignificant things our partners do but for the significant things; we should definitely bring to their attention so that changes can be made. We shouldn’t always nag about things they do that you don’t like and sometimes, you should compromise something so that your spouse can be happy and that your relationship can grow.

mistake

In all these things that I have said, don’t make the mistake of ignoring the red flags you know you can’t deal with just because you want to be with them.
Don’t play Russian roulette with your heart by hoping they will change later because they don’t; actually they never change.

You can’t change a person because a person decides who they want to be, even their parents couldn’t change them; so who are you to think you’d change them.
How can love be blind when people choose to stay with the person who has cheated on them with four different people? how can love be blind when someone decides to stay in an abusive relationship because they hope that the abuser will change even when it’s been happening for 3 years? How can love be blind when you stay with someone whom you see is in a relationship with someone else but you still say he/she will realise how much you love them? Here’s a quick advice, loving them harder will not make things better or change their mind, just let go.

Love

Love is not blind but people are. We are either in denial with the reality to whatever kind because of how we feel about that particular person or we don’t want to let go because of the memories they gave us and the impact they made in our lives. If relationships were to be classified as marriage, I would painfully say I have had more than 5 divorces in my life.  To whoever wants to fall in love, I want you to know that is the best thing in the world and so I’d advise you to do it without thinking twice.
As you do it, don’t be blind and choose to overlook the red flags of that person because it will bite you back. Don’t be blind because love is not blind.

LD7

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