BETRAYING THE SISTERHOOD

Sir,
 
We all find it easier to label others, point out their weaknesses and not so good characters than to actually praise and compliment them. I guess it makes us feel better about ourselves to know that someone else is suffering, and even worse off. But what we do not know is that every time we open our lips to say something demeaning about someone else, or even something good about ourselves that distinguishes us from others, we say hate speeches about our own kind! Women empowerment movements throughout the world have been mainly focusing on elimination of patriarchy, female oppression at the hands of men and instead of male privilege, have been promoting equality of the sexes. For a long time, and even now especially in our  society these tenets are held as truths.

Mindset

But for now let us look at how this mindset impacts the thinking and actions of ‘empowered’ women. What patriarchy theory sets up is a perceptual framework in which men play the villains and women the victims. Women are the vulnerable creatures, pure and good. Men on the other hand, are the powerful, overbearing and evil brutes responsible for virtually every societal problem. No man dares to question this perceptual framework because they would automatically be regarded as oppressors and uncompassionate monsters.

Confusion

If a woman questions this frame of thinking, then this initially causes confusion. This confusion quickly turns to anger and she is regarded as betraying the sisterhood or a victim of brainwashing by the patriarchy and religious zealots. When a plus-sized woman is empowered, she gains confidence, but when she starts saying, ‘A real woman has curves, only dogs go for bones’, I think that if anyone thinks this way, then they are not entirely empowered, but turned into hateful human beings. This is because a real woman doesn’t call men dogs, or other women bones. Once one is enlightened with gender equality issues, then one should also be enlightened in the fact that in order to be equal to someone else, then one has to give the same respect to the other person that one expects back.

Hate

But most importantly, the main pushing factor that inspired this writing is the saddening observation of how women increasingly hate each other in the name of empowerment. There are words such as ‘fake’ and ‘plastic’ among others, which are being used by women referring to other women. It is hypocritical of us to encourage acceptance and freedom of choice, and yet when other women make different choices from us, then we call them fake and unreal. As we become more alert and more open to gender issues and women empowerment, we should really be harmless to women and respectful of women’s rights and choices.

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