RELATIONSHIPS IN VARSITY A LUXURY, NOT A NECESSITY

Sir,
I am a university graduate and just like many, I was once a ‘comrade’ in campus life. During my time at university, I had friends who were in relationships and thought they would eventually marry. However, after graduation, most of these relationships ended. Now, they are all living their separate lives. Imagine the time they invested in these relationships, only to break up later. The truth is, very few campus couples actually end up getting married.

Relationships

Many students are in serious relationships while at university, but let me be honest with you; chances are, you won’t marry her. Even if you make it to graduation, there is a high probability that you’ll break up with her eventually. She will meet someone else who is more financially stable than you and while you are struggling to find a job or build a career, she may already have secured a job thanks to connections she has made through networking.

Support

Throughout your time in university, you may have spent years with her, using your parents’ hard-earned money to take care of her—paying for her rent, her bills and even her tuition fees, while you defer your own semester just to support her. Meanwhile, your parents are working tirelessly to pay your school fees, while you’re focusing on a relationships instead of your academics and future career. That is a huge mistake. You are prioritising the wrong things. You don’t need to go to such extremes to be with a woman right now. Having a partner at this stage of your life is a luxury, not a necessity. And to be honest with you, many of you aren’t in a position where you deserve to be in a relationship. A lot of men right now simply lack the skills or resources to make their own lives successful, let alone someone else’s.

Discipline

I am being hard on you because I want you to understand the reality. You need to shift your mind set. Focus on developing discipline, working on your personal growth and building your career. Go to the gym, become a better version of yourself and, if necessary, let her go. Right now, you may not be in the best position to be with someone and you need to focus on improving yourself first. Fix yourself before you can think about having a successful relationship.

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