NEW-AGE PARENTING: A PSYCHOLOGICAL TAKE

IT is an open secret that, as the times have changed, there has also been a massively significant shift in the dynamics involved in parenting, particularly from the parents’ perspective. We can all agree that deciding to have children, nowadays, is not only a financially monumental task but also a very complex psycho- emotional one, from both the side of the parent and of the child as well. I always refer back to the evolution of our society, as a significant contributor to our social status quo, with this instance being no different.

Landscape

Many of the things that are a part of our lives now, were not present twenty-thirty years ago. On account of that, the social landscape is a slight far-cry from what it used to be, and that alone should be a strong enough call for parents to modify, tweak and accomodate their approach to relationships with their children.

Innovations

Our society today is a free-flowing one with a variety of innovations that may be a tad peculiar to the ‘older generation’, but very much appealing to the youth. In these times of smartphones, the Internet and social media, parents face stiff competition from  these in the raising of their children.As scary as this may sound, it is true that what they see on that phone they are constantly clutching has more of an influence in determining and probably even shaping their personality, going forward. Besides influencing their personalities, the glorification of drugs, that is seemingly rife on places like social media pose another challenge for parents, because, of course the children will want to ‘imitate their idols’ and engage in such behaviours. I, in no way, intend to sound like a ‘grumpy old man’, however, I do feel everything has both a good and a bad side and, sometimes, the negatives are a lot more potent.

Also, on account of the aforementioned reasons, it becomes a problem for parents to monitor, adjust to and impact the mental health of their children. Since there are just too ‘many psychological obstacles to go past’, children, nowadays, are often susceptible to many invalid sources for their psycho-emotional well-being: Such as peers, who themselves are just as equally confused, and, of course, the media. Basically, it is harder for children to believe affirmation, recognition and encouragement from their parents, because their peers’ words mean more to them. This places the parents in somewhat of a conundrum, because regardless of how much they try to support and be there for their children, you find that they still suffer from mental illnesses; resorting to drugs and sometimes, even suicide.

This is is why many parents suffer from the ‘where did I go wrong’ syndrome because they have been unknowingly stripped of their paternal responsibility to ensure the utmost physical and mental health for their children.As much as this is the situation we find ourselves in today, it is not one that we have to adapt to as parents and accomodate all these changes as part of the whole parenting process. Many learn the hard way that the old-school, traditional and strict way of doing things with children is far less effective as it used to be. As disappointing as this may be, perhaps try alternative ways to relate with your child, keep that rapport as clean and transparent as possible and maybe, once in a while, demote yourself from parent to peer, in a bid to understand your offspring that much better. Send comments to runsford0505@gmail.com.

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