SAIL THROUGH THE STORMS

I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship.

Think about that for a moment. On a calm, sunny day, there is little wind, often barely a breeze. How do you make a sailing ship do anything with little to no wind?
For a beginner, such calm seas are largely a frustrating waste of time. Better there be a hint of a coming storm to get the breeze started. What a beginner needs, someone who is just learning how to sail their ship, is a reasonably strong wind. That’s what storms provide as they approach. When a storm is approaching, however, is when most people begin to panic. While in the height of a storm, sailing will be less smooth, and dangers abound, a light squall is a great time to sharpen skills and to practice your ability to manage your systems and yourself. In short, it’s a great time to learn, if you can handle the conditions, which is precisely the message that I am sending across.

Reasons

Most people don’t like to be out in storms. There are plenty of good reasons. For someone learning to sail, it brings additional challenges. It’s a great way to train in adverse conditions. It’s a great way to test your limits. It’s a great way to challenge yourself. Challenges are how most of us learned when we were younger. Rolling over was a challenge, which muscles did what, and how do you command them to move from your back to your front? Same with crawling. Anyone who’s seen a baby learning how to overcome these challenges is probably giggling now. Challenges are part of most cultures, whether it’s a rite of passage or just casual dares between friends. Our desires also help us both come up with, and overcome challenges, from determining how to properly prepare a meal to approaching and talking to a stranger.

Imagine how bland your life would be if there were no challenges. That sounds like a very gray world, with nothing interesting to do, nothing fun going on, and obviously no sports or other contests of skill or ability, since those are challenging by nature. Challenges are essential to a fulfilling life, in my opinion. Do you agree or disagree? Personally, I like most challenges. I love to climb things, I love to fix things, to figure out why it isn’t working, and then make it work again. While we will all have certain types of challenges we don’t like or would prefer to avoid, I doubt too many of us want absolutely none in our lives.

The trick then becomes how to manage our comfort level with respect to the challenges in our lives. Some challenges come unbidden, such as accidents and acts of chance. Others are outside our ability to control, such as the loss of a job. However, there are others we can manage. When your buddy dares you to try the super-hot, extra spicy twelve alarm chilli, you might not want to take that chance, right? I selected an extreme example, but I believe you get the idea. There are some things we do to ourselves. What are some of the challenges you are facing at the moment? Grab some paper and start writing them down. I would recommend including some of the little ones, if only for practice.

Groups

You might want to try eliminating some of the smaller challenges as a warm-up exercise, right? First, sort them into two groups, the ones you have control over, and the ones where you don’t have much control. Starting with the second group, even though you cannot fundamentally change the challenge, look at each and consider how you might reduce the challenge, even by just a bit.

As you get ideas, write them down for future reference. Are you noticing any patterns? Are you letting the challenges run your life, instead of you being in charge and selecting the challenges? Yes, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. I’m not trying to diminish your circumstances. But don’t let despair spiral out of control, right. Having spent some time on the big challenges, the ones you don’t have much control over, let’s look at the other group. Start by determining which challenges you can abandon. While I enjoy fixing things, there are times when I have too much going on, too many other challenges. Then, I either throw it out or pay someone else to fix it. Challenge managed.

Look at what challenges are left. What can you do to reduce their impact on your life? Can you get some help on some of them? Can you postpone some to a later date? What can you hire out or assign to other people? What other options do you have? That will depend on the nature of the challenges you have, right? You will have to work your way through your challenges and select what to do about each. But the alternative, while appealing for a short period of time, isn’t for most of us. Yes, it would be nice to have nothing to do, and no responsibilities, but I can’t handle that for more than a little while. How about you? Challenges help us learn. About ourselves, about our nature, and about the task at hand. Whether it’s sailing in rough weather or learning to crawl, we have to give it a try to see how well we do. Then try again, after learning from our prior attempt.

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