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EXPERIENCE A HARD TEACHER, TEST FIRST

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This is the testing method of the School of Hard Knocks, otherwise known as learning as you go.  Put another way, experience is how you figure things out by trial and error. When you don’t know what you’re doing; you take the test, and then try to learn from what life hands back to you. That is how experience works.

That isn’t a lot of fun; at least I don’t think so, do you? The test is whatever you are trying to accomplish. Either you do or you don’t. As you view the wreckage and try to pick up the pieces, you have the opportunity to learn the lesson. In school, we usually get some hints up front, and then we get the test. You tend to cover more ground that way. But experience does have the advantage of grinding the lesson in quite deeply. You will learn. Experience will see to that. It won’t guarantee that you learn the proper lesson, just that you will learn.

Future

Just as some learn to hide their heart when they are in a bad relationship, others will learn to be even more open in the future. Who is right? That would depend on the person and the situation. But there are other ways to learn besides experience. There are other schools besides the School of Hard Knocks. And besides formal educational settings, one can learn from blogs, websites, online videos, training or seminars. There are also library books and e-books. All of these things can help you learn. My favourite is a mentor. If you can find someone who has done what you wish to do, and follow their advice, you are way ahead of the game. A mentor is better, in my opinion, than a class or a book, because you can ask them questions, and get their advice on how to proceed.

This is useful if your situation is different from theirs. Books and other static media can’t adapt, at least until the second edition comes out. Asking questions is key to learning, at least in my experience. Because experience is both what you gain from learning, and a method of learning. Try for the former when you can, but always pay attention to the lessons of the latter.
You are already applying this in your life, and when you aren’t, your life is applying it to you anyway. This statement is a fundamental truth of life. There is no denying it, and there is no way of escaping it. As long as there are people on the Earth, we will continue to do dumb things, and we will be graded. It is up to us to learn our lesson.Take a moment and consider what the most recent lesson you learnt.

Did you learn about getting up on time? Did you learn about courtesy or holding your tongue when you wanted to speak? Did you say something you regretted? Did you do something foolish? Were you too emotional or not emotional enough? Any of those experiences will have taught you something. Was it the right lesson? Well, if it wasn’t, be prepared to be graded again. And again. Until you pass the test. That’s how you learn to crawl. That’s how you learn to walk. That’s how you learn to ride a bicycle. That’s how you learn to drive a car. As you learn, you better understand how things work, and can apply these lessons to your future endeavours.
beginning
 Learning to ride a bicycle usually includes some experience interacting with traffic. When it comes time to learn to drive, you apply some of what you learnt to your driving, and correct the rest, right?
In the beginning, we learnt by experience. Then we went to school, and began learning in a different manner. But we still learnt from experience on the playground and after school. When we graduated, many quit learning from a mentor or from books. Experience is an effective, if hard, teacher.While there is no way to eliminate learning the hard way, we can put some effort into finding other ways to learn. Again, I recommend mentors when they can be found. Failing that, something or somewhere which has a comments section or forum, so that questions may be asked. After that, even a little book learning beats trying something with out a single clue.
At work we can find mentors in other employees. Some companies even have a formal mentor-ship programme, where you work with an experienced person until you have a feel for what the job entails, and then ask questions when you get stuck or confused.
If not, try to make a friend and direct your questions to them. Could you use a mentor for your interpersonal relationships? What about your hobbies? Do you like to learn by experience, or would you like to be able to ask a question of an expert? What other skills or activities would benefit from your having a life-line or a mentor to help you out?
You will learn. It’s just a matter of time and effort involved. How do you want to do it?

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