Well, that makes for an easy start to the article today. Since you can’t measure happiness; unlike with height, weight, financial wealth and the number of press-ups you can do in a day. You can even measure how long you can tap a drum at one speed, with the right hand and double speed with the left. Failure there was precisely why I got evicted from the cadet force band in my school days.
Happiness is entirely subjective. Accepting that shortcoming, you could still ask a person the question - giving it a mark out of ten, how happy are you? The trouble is, you might offer five out of 10 if asked while getting up for work on a Monday morning, and 10 out of 10 when your football team wins the local derby.
So, let’s slide out of the word ‘happy’ and into the word ‘contented.’ After all, you never see anyone walking up and down, driving here and there, laughing or just beaming all the time in an apparently wonderful state of permanent happiness.
Human beings aren’t made that way and if you did behave like that, you’d have the psychiatric wing of the local hospital starting to follow you round. Being contented is what we should aim for. ‘Aim’ is arguably (though ‘contented’ people will surely not argue about it) the right word because unless you are a very fortunate person, contentment - and by that I mean a sustained contentment - invariably has to be worked at.
Money and especially the hunger for acquisition of money and its equivalent carries that ancient label - ‘the root of all evil’. It doesn’t mean the pursuit of acquisition of money will lead to evil. Merely, that behind most evil lies a ruthless and selfish drive for financial wealth that undermines all decent standards of human behaviour. Satisfying lust, not obtaining contentment.
For contentment and that’s what we’re pursuing today, all you need is enough money to give you a comfortable life and remove the debilitating worry and discomfort that comes when you tremble at the sight of a bill in the letter- or post-box for the basics in life, such as electricity and water supply, education and health costs. Most important - food and shelter. Beyond that is a bonus, to be appreciated and wealth does appear to help you die more comfortably.
Contentment is a deeply ingrained state of mind. Big posh cars are not the route to contentment, in many cases merely the exposure to narcissism. Though, it’s valuable in the present day to have access to resources. The laptop, smartphone and motor car do boost your knowledge, skills and mobility for income generation.
One of the best ways of achieving contentment is the time-honoured technique embodied within the act of meditation. Find a quiet, interruption-free place and select the mantra, that being the message you want your mind to absorb and retain. The mantra may be a short and simple word or phrase: ‘Contented’ or ’at peace’. It is repeated to ensure cementation in the mind. My own preference – and I’m not declaring the success quotient - is to identify the zones, then switch on the fertile mind and select the mantra. Let’s look at a few zones; mantras in italics.
The feeling of ‘love’ and being loved goes deep into the heart and mind. That’s loving one or more people, and ‘feeling loved’. You need an interesting career, commonly captured as ‘following your passion’, as well as a deep interest in, and love of the world around you. You don’t have to own mountains, hills, fields and rivers to enjoy their beauty, and wonder at the creation of all that’s around you.
For many, one of the greatest contributors to contentment is a ‘spiritual faith’. The belief in an afterlife is very important in setting standards for this life and being enabled to look forward to an eternal life that lies beyond. A further advantage is that in the event that there is no afterlife, the believer will never be disappointed.
The act of ‘giving’to the needy must be one of the most rewarding in one’s earthly life. Helping to make the world a better place. It defines you and makes an enormous contribution to a contented state of mind; while of both material benefit to the receiver and spiritual benefit to the giver. If you don’t gain a strong feeling of contentment when delivering an ‘act of kindness’, then there’s something missing in you. Time to reflect.
If you’ve heard me offering one or more of the above suggestions before, then please treat it as a mantra-building exercise. Hearing it many times, especially when reciting it to yourself, perhaps during meditation, is a healthy route to embedding the items in your mind. I will admit - even at the risk of being laughed at (at least that would release endorphins into your brain and make you feel happy, and that’s a fact) - I will admit to a strange sensation. At the end of bashing out the first draft of this article, I actually felt a light surge of happiness which lasted most of the morning. Was that just a coincidence? Not at all. Then I got the bill...
Happiness is entirely subjective. Accepting that shortcoming, you could still ask a person the question - giving it a mark out of ten, how happy are you? (Pic: Darius Foroux)